Reclaimed wood robot figure and desk buddy (Scraplet), handmade by me, the Chief Scrapleteer.
"Clarty Dave From The Boro, 43, Middlesbrough. Aye up, this gadge is the boss. Takes no shit from no one, a proper straight talker - even sinister Baron Crème Fraiche goes and hides behind the sofa when Clarty Dave's in a radge and starts stomping about the place, looking for his slippers. Loves reading the Evening Gazette from cover to cover every day and doesn't believe in the Internet, saying stuff like "Yer fuckin' divvy, our mam didn't bring us bairns up to spend all day on a fuckin' screen looking at all the lasses with no tops on like. Read the fuckin' paper, gadgie. Google? Yer jokin' aren't yer? Fuckin' shite.""
There's a whole cast of fun (and insane) Scraplet characters available in my Etsy store and on www.scraplets.co.uk. Take a look at @scraplets on Instagram for daily Scraplet updates and enter their magical world, listen to their favourite music and get some terrific life advice.
£4 UK P&P across the board for up to 2KG of Scraplets. That’s Royal Mail 2nd class parcel service for you, and the cost of a cardboard box. You might as well buy a family of them given the postage situation.
NB - Scraplets are NOT toys for children, to be honest. They're wood decor. Put simply, they're not really suitable for unsupervised use by children - they've got nails and screws sticking out of them. Common sense and vigilance is advised at all times.
Viva le Scraplets!